Myanmar missing--no fun (r)

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>>From The Denver Post, Sports Pages, 19 July 1996:

It's not fun and Games with Myanmar missing
By Woody Paige

ATLANTA -- Don't let the Games begin.

The Olympics can't start without Myanmar.

If you see the Myanmar athletes, tell them we are waiting.

Of the record 197 countries competing in the Centennial Summer
Olympics, only Myanmar is missing, and the Games are supposed 
to commence tonight with the opening ceremonies.

"We'll give them until the opening ceremonies to register," 
says Gilbert Fellie, sports director for the International 
Olympic Committee.  "We are sure they'll show, but if they 
don't, we'll have to go on without Myanmar."

Where in hell, you may ask, is Myanmar?

It's a lovely country and dominant global sports power on the
Bay of Bengal in southeast Asia.

Myanmar used to be called Burma.  But Myanmar Shave doesn't 
sound quite right.

Maybe the Myanmar team is stuck at Denver International Airport.

The Chinese basketball players were delayed there for a while.  
Don't ask me what they were doing flying through DIA.  (Complaints 
about the new airport haven't reached China.)

The fine China team flew with me to Atlanta, and I met that 
nation's pre-eminent basketball star, Zhishia Wang.

I gave him my snack lunch.  He is a growing boy.  Zhishia Wang is 
a 7-footer, and he is just 16.  At the Junior World Championships
he averaged 22.3 points, 12 rebounds and 4.8 blocked shots.

"Has he ever heard of the Denver Nuggets?" I asked the team's 
interpreter.

The chief de mission spoke to Zhishia Wang in a language that was
Chinese to me.

"No, he knows Bulls and Lakers."

"Tell him the Nuggets need a center next season, and I would be 
willing to represent him in the negotiations.  I can get him a 
seven-year contract for 95 million jiaos."

"But the jiaos is worth 10 cents on the dollar."

"OK, we'll go for 950 million jiaos.  Tell him nobody has ever made 950 
million jiaos before.

"And we'll name the arena after him.  Man does not fly in the House
of Wang."